The Power of Intention: Competing With Purpose in Life

By Alexia Akuchie, MFT / MFTC / MSCP

As a therapist, I talk often about growth, resilience, and healing. But if I’m honest, long before I became a clinician, I was an athlete. For six years, I competed at the collegiate level. I thrived on discipline, structure, and the pursuit of excellence. I loved the grind. I loved the challenge. I loved being surrounded by people who wanted to be the best of the best.

Competition shaped me.

But here’s what I learned both on the field and in life: you cannot truly compete without intention.

Intention Is What Separates Motion From Progress

As an athlete, I learned that talent alone doesn’t win championships. You can show up every day, sweat, and exhaust yourself, but without clear intention, you are just moving. You are not progressing.

The same is true in therapy and in life.

We can stay busy.We can stay distracted.We can even try.

But if we are not intentional about our healing, our relationships, our habits, and our mindset, we remain stuck in cycles that feel frustratingly familiar.

Intention asks us:

• What am I working toward? • Why does this matter? • Who do I want to become?

Without that clarity, competition turns into comparison.

With intention, competition becomes growth.

In 2021, I underwent back surgery. Doctors were not optimistic about my outcome. There were conversations about the possibility that I might never walk again.

For someone whose identity had been deeply rooted in physical performance and strength, this was devastating.

But something shifted in me. I no longer competed against other athletes - I competed against yesterday’s version of myself.

One more step. One more breath. One more rep.

Mindfulness became my anchor. Determination became my fuel. Competition became internal.

I had to be intentional about every movement. Every physical therapy session. Every thought I allowed into my mind, slowly, step by step, I walked again.

Not because it was easy.Not because it was guaranteed.

But because intention, paired with relentless determination, changes outcomes.

Competition Is Not Toxic - It Is Transformational.

As a therapist, I often see people afraid of the word competition. They associate it with ego, comparison, or pressure.

But healthy competition, especially competition with yourself, can be transformational.

It looks like waking up and deciding:

“I will handle this conversation better than I did last time.”

“I will respond instead of react.”

“I will choose growth over comfort.”

Competition becomes dangerous only when it lacks intention.

With intention, it becomes a tool for mastery.

A Little About Me

I am not just a therapist. I am a human first.

I am a proud dog mom to the sweetest companion who reminds me daily of unconditional love. I recently bought my first home, which felt like its own championship win.

I have been married for about two years to a former professional basketball player. This means our household can feel like an Olympic arena at times. Game nights are definitely not casual in our home.

Competition is woven into our lives, but so is commitment, communication, and humor.

And that is intentional too.

Why I Chose This Work

I come from a broken family. I know firsthand what instability, conflict, and emotional wounds can do to a person.I also know how deeply we long for connection, safety, and belonging.

I became a therapist because I wanted to interrupt unhealthy cycles.

I wanted to help people build what they may not have seen modeled.

I wanted to help couples strengthen their bond, families repair what feels shattered, and individuals heal the parts of themselves they have been quietly fighting for years.

You cannot change your past - but you can be intentional about your future.

Your Struggles Are Not the End

If you are in a season that feels impossible, I want you to hear this clearly:

Struggles can be overcome.

Not by ignoring them.Not by wishing them away.

But by approaching them with intention, by competing against your own limitations, and by allowing yourself to receive help when needed.

Even elite athletes have coaches.

Even the strongest people need support.

There is no shame in asking for help. There is strength in it.

Final Thoughts

Being the best - in sports, in marriage, in parenting, and in healing, requires more than desire. It requires intention.

It requires deciding who you want to be and competing every day to become that person.

And sometimes, it requires someone walking alongside you while you do.

You are capable of more than you think.

Be intentional. Compete with yesterday. And do not be afraid to ask for help along the way.

Alexia with her companion Duke